Shinji, stop calling me during work, PLEASE
Relationships: Ibu Shinji/Kamio Akira, Akutsu Jin/Sengoku Kiyosumi
Characters: Ibu Shinji, Kamio Akira, Akutsu Jin
Rating: G
Type: Oneshot
Words: 914
Warnings: None
Tags: -
Originally posted: Posted on AO3 in 2012, posted originally to FF.net somewhere between 2010-2006.
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Shinji growls at the phone in his hands, muttering under his breath. There is a mail from Kamio open, one that tells him that he would be late due to work.
“Shin Ill be l8 so dont wait up.”
The blackhaired man reads aloud. Akutsu sends him a glare that says
'Shut the fuck up and did you just read that as fucking l8?'
Yes, indeed, Shinji had read 'late' as 'L.8'. He doesn't get why that would be a problem, because really, that's what it says, so why wouldn't he read it as that and
why are you glaring at me like that Akutsu-san, it's rude and you shouldn't be rude to your co-workers even if you've known them for a long time, besides, aren't you used to your boyfriend's ramblings because aren't you dating that Sengoku-san who was on the same team as you were and why are you banging your head into the table like that, Akutsu-san?
While Akutsu is still face down on his desk, Shinji closes the mail and dials Kamio's number. Voice mail. Hm. Oh well, he'll just have to be short. He starts,
Akira? Or maybe I should call you 'Kamio' since I'm still at work and 'Akira' sounds so intimate but I don't know if I should, since we're boyfriends and all it shouldn't matter, right, but what do you think? I was thinking that maybe you wanted me to call you that when I'm at work but it feels strange and since I don't say it normally, why should I say it? Oh, Akutsu-san is glaring at me again, I wonder why. Huh. It's so rude to glare like that, but every time I tell him that he just glares at me even more for some reason. And he starts snarling when I mention that Sengoku-san, but they're dating so shouldn't he be happy? We both know him after all, since you won against him in middle school so I should be allowed to mention him because I know him so I don't get why and-
Message too long. Beep. Beep. Beep.
Shinji dials the same number again. Just like last time, he gets voice mail.
Really, that thing is so rude just cutting me off like that. Mattaku, just like Akutsu-san. Does that mean that Akutsu-san is a voice mail machine? He doesn't look like one, but what do I know, maybe they invented human-looking ones. Huh. Doesn't explain why he likes to fight all the time though. Maybe some voice mail machines likes that sort of things. Aah, I don't know, but does that mean that Sengoku-san likes phone sex? Because he likes having sex with Akutsu-san, or so he's told me, Sengoku-san I mean, Akutsu-san won't tell me anything about his sex life but then again, I get to know everything about it whenever I talk to Sengoku-san anyway so I do-
Message too long. Beep. Beep. Beep.
Kamio swears under his breath. Damnit. Shinji has left him more voice messages. Ten of them, all too long to fit the time limit, except the last one, where he hears an angry snarl of
Moron's hanging up now,
signaling that Akutsu finally got enough of his co-worker's rambles.
Just as the last one ends, he steps through the door to the bedroom to see Shinji lying in the bed, wrapped in both of their covers, reaching them up to his ears. He's staring at him.
Damnit Shin, don't do that!
Kamio exclaims, pulling back for a second before starting to undress, feeling Shinji's eyes on him as he does. Those eyes fix on his hips and then on his ass and then he can hear Shinji mumble something. Something that doesn't have an end. As usual.
Shin, what are you saying?
He hopes it's not involving the topic on the voice messages.
But of course it is.
I really think that Sengoku-san got some sort of secret fetish involving voice mail. But then, it might not be a secret and it's just that we've missed it, since he's dating a human looking voice mail box. What does Kamio think? Aah, I wonder. He was late home today, I wonder why? Or maybe he was waiting for me to start having some sort of sex with the phone as well, while it recorded it like Sengoku-san probably does, and then when Akutsu-san hears it, he has to go to the bathroom but pretending that he's going out for a smoke. Aah. So that's what he's really doing when he leaves the room saying that he's going to smoke. But then, one of the slang words for 'cigarette' is 'fag', and maybe he thinks of Sengoku as one so maybe he's not really pretending but we're just thinking that he is, taking things for granted. Aah. That must be it. I must ask him tomorrow. I wonder if-
Shinji is cut short -though not short because he's been ranting for several minutes- by Kamio exclaiming,
Shin, stop calling me during work, PLEASE.
Which, of course sends Shinji into another tirade, ranting about that
but I can't send text messages and Akira should know that. Aah. Maybe I should punish him for it? I don't know. What if he's a masochist like Sengoku-san? I-
This time he is silenced by a pair of lips on his, and it works much better than the first try. Because really, Shinji is too occupied to talk right now.